03 January 2013

My (First) Wedding

A few weeks ago, I received an email from an old friend asking me to witness/officiate the vows at her wedding.  I emailed her as soon as I received word that I would be ordained in time and told her that I'd love to do so.  We're now in the process of figuring all the logistics out: how I'm getting there, where I'm staying, what the readings will be, what her fiance is like ... the list could go on and on and on.

In the very near future, I need to contact the Diocese of the wedding to figure out their requirements for a letter of suitability.  I have also contacted the pastor asking for delegation.

And all between the emails and stealing a look at the Rite this afternoon (and again just now), the entire reality of ordination is upon me.  Surely, I won't be ordained a deacon for another six months.  (Or six months minus two days.)  But the reality of what is happening here -- the responsibility, the grace, the privilege  the challenge -- it has just set in.

Yes, this will be my life and I will get used to it.
And yes, I am receiving incredible training to prepare me to serve as a deacon  (and then priest).
Yes also: I have been praying and thinking and thirsting for Orders for many years (did it begin when I started playing "Mass" with my grandmother at age three?)

But still: it's so real.  I recall that old Pedro Arrupe (former General of the Jesuits) quote that everyone likes to use.  It goes something like this:
Fall in love, stay in love and it will change anything.

And I appreciate that and all, but I think there is something more going on.

Because you see, my vocation story, it wasn't/isn't about falling in love and staying in love.  No, it was more about falling in love and continuing to fall -- further and further into His love.

At some point, in this crazy thing called a vocation, you look around, realize what happened and think: why me?  But that's exactly the wrong question to ask.

No: better to ask, how me?  And God answers: Because of me, not you.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You are on fire with these recent posts. A very exciting request, you are on your way. I recall one of your "Masses" at Grandma's house. If I remember correctly, at one point you got annoyed at Luke (your brother, not the Gospel that is).

Chris J.